Getting attached to results is a slippery slope going nowhere. Yet I often cling (clutch is more like it ) to my attachment as if my life depends upon it. Like worrying about some possible future event, attaching to results creates its own misery and has little to do with the outcome.
This past Monday I receive a short message during my prayer/reflection time:
"Trust. Take Appropriate Action. Let Go."
Simple words. Familiar words. What is different now? Impeccable timing. I'm ready to receive this message. My business partner and I need to find buyers for several investor properties within a 3-week deadline. It doesn't help that funding for 2 of these properties got unexpectedly pulled out with no warning. I feel the pressure, the panic. How can I market these differently to attract buyers in time?
I step back from the emotion. I decide to sandwich in my actions between trust and letting go. I experience an odd sense of calm. I create a little marketing twist to get people's attention. I present these properties in an investor meeting from a different angle than previous meetings. As a result, several serious buyers come forward with an interest in looking at those properties.
By week's end, I begin to imagine other scenarios and outcomes I hadn't even considered when I was fixated on a specific result. I discuss these other options with my business partner - options we can pursue if our buyers don't all come through at the same time. I feel amazed that practicing non-attachment, giving up the clinging and clutching, creates a sense of clear-headed expansiveness in the absence of drama!
My learning continues during the week when I receive Suzanne Falter-Barns' latest issue of her Expert Status Ezine in my inbox - "I'm Done with Results . . . How About You?" Pretty enticing title, isn't it?
My big takeaway - the meaning we attach to results creates the problem, not necessarily the results themselves. In Suzanne's words:
For instance, recently I started really getting into how many folks were visiting my blog every week. I worried if the numbers were lower than usual, and had surges of delight when the report swung high. And then I’d try to figure out what I did right or wrong that particular week … and consequently mull it over, tease it out, analyze and just generally fret.
In the light of my new non-attachment to results, I can see that it doesn’t ultimately matter how many people visit my blog. That number was just proving to be an ego stroke or an ego bash. What matters is actually how I’m interacting with the blog – and what REALLY matters is how effectively I’m sharing with my readers.
So now the focus has shifted to the journey, and how I choose to play it out. When I’m excited about what I’m writing and put lots of energy into my blog posts, the numbers coincidentally go up. Conversely, when I’m lazy about it and lose touch for a week here or there, the numbers happen to go down.
Suzanne goes on to ask the pivotal questions:
Instead of looking to see how many people hit my blog so I can stroke my ego and feel powerful, I might ask instead, how truly and deeply am I sharing with others today? Am I reflecting what Spirit wants me to reflect today?* " . . .Is my writing for this ezine teaching me what I need to know in order to keep spreading that love?
As Suzanne illustrates, we need to examine the meaning we attach to results. When I'm stressing and struggling, my husband will jokingly ask me: "Are we having fun yet?" The question at least gives me pause and perspective! Are ego's big footprints all over the meaning I attach to results? If so, how can I change the meaning to reflect a higher purpose? This week in my business challenge I focused on imagining outcomes that benefit all involved. And that includes me too, Sometimes I shortchange myself.
This morning, before I write this post, I receive another dose of reinforcement in the words of a prayer from Julia Cameron's Heart Steps:
I am able to allow situations to evolve and alter. I am able to await outcomes. I tolerate quiet periods of non-knowing while solutions emerge and present themselves. I do not force solutions. I expect the successful working-out of difficulties and differences. My heart is wise. It knows when to act and when non-action is the action to take.
My latest mantra - Cling Less, Live More!
Any lessons/insights you'd like to share on the meaning you attach (or don't attach) to results you seek?
[Photo Credit: kjdrill]