Today's post, 3rd and final in a series of 3, describes the remaining four distinctions between true intuitive guidance, and ego-driven guidance (which actually sabotages us).
Characteristics of True (Higher) Guidance and False (Lower/Ego) Guidance
by Doreen Virtue, Ph.D. (From her book, Divine Guidance)
9. True Guidance empowers you. False Guidance weakens you. True guidance may share news that indicates unexpected change, but will do so in a supportive and loving way. False guidance sends us messages that leave us feeling helpless, victimized or persecuted. Doreen Virtue offers this question as a litmus test of sorts - ask yourself - "Do I feel empowered by this message?" If not, it is not true guidance.
Here is a current personal example. [Jan '06] My husband has lived under the fear of getting laid off or fired for several months, for reasons that certainly appear logical, including that his entire department was decimated, and 60% of his peers are no longer there. The intuitive guidance that I have consistently received for months indicates no loss of job. But as time goes on, and the guidance remains positive and loving, I believe that the issue of his getting fired is a "non-issue," in that no matter what happens, we'll be supported and we'll be fine.
[Those of you who followed my blog last year may recall that my husband did indeed get his walking papers early last year and was unemployed for 5 months. It was a huge change, with challenges and silver linings, and that change helped to catapult me into my own career change last summer. Along the way, amazing sources of positive support kept us going and sustained us. We are in a great place now, and things keep getting better and better.]
10. True Guidance is to the point. False Guidance rationalizes with wordiness. True guidance is clear, direct, and unambiguous. False guidance beats around the bush, while contaminating you with fear and anxiety.
Have you ever been in a bookstore and felt guided to buy a book? It happens all the time to me. One time I ignored the guidance, left the bookstore, got in my car, and heard an inner voice telling me in crystal clear language to go back in the store to buy a particular book. And so I did.
Or how about when you make a sudden turn down a road you weren't planning on? I recall a time when I "unconsciously" turned right instead of left to go to my Jazzercise class, so I missed my usual shortcut. I was ready to turn around, when I felt guided to continue going down the road I turned on. Five minutes later, when I caught up to the place where my usual shortcut ends, there was a traffic accident. Cars were backed up. Because I turned right instead of left at the beginning of the trip, I breezed by without delay.
Earlier this week as I pulled up into the bank drive-through, 3 lanes were open, all with 1 car in each lane. I got an automatic nudge to go in the middle lane. I chose not to. Wouldn't you know it, that lane moved fast, and my lane didn't. We can have fun with this too!
11. True Guidance comes suddenly and completely in response to prayer/meditation. False Guidance comes gradually in response to worry. True guidance often comes as a complete chunk of information out of the blue. Recall the example I shared yesterday - the Higher Guidance that came through in one big chunk in a meditation around a career question. If there is a chain of thoughts that lead to your guidance, it's probably coming from your lower self. When you think of a person out of the blue, without any trail of thought leading up to it, this indicates true Divine guidance. When seemingly random thoughts, visions, feelings seem to come out of nowhere, without any thought leading up to them, pay attention - your true guidance is calling you.
12. True Guidance never puts you above or below others. False Guidance says you are better or worse than others. The lower ego self tries to convince us to be a "star" that others will adore, but ends up putting us in roles where we compete, attack, or win at others expense. Our true self does not elevate us above other people. Rather, true guidance shows us scenarios in which to make a meaningful contribution with our natural talents.
I once listened to a CD that featured a millionaire talking about his business failures and successes. He said that whenever he got involved in a business for the money, but did not believe in the business, he lost his shirt. He has since learned to make sure there is a philosophical fit in businesses that he invests in.
This reminds me of how I succumbed to ego fears in the early days of my coaching career in the late 1990's. I was invited to join a coaching company. I received instantaneous guidance that this company was not a good fit for me. In no uncertain terms I was told that who I was and how I worked with people would not be honored. I was not to join this company. My lower self told me I couldn't get clients on my own and I better join. I listened to my ego, much to my detriment. I was miserable and didn't receive one paying client from this company. Four months later I came to my senses and left. The week that I left, I heard about an advanced coaching program starting up called "Coaching from Spirit," a program designed to teach coaches how to tap into and use Divine Guidance, and to teach clients how to do the same. I finally felt like I was coming "home." It's such a strong reminder to me to remember that in saying "no" to what is not right for me, I make room to say "yes" to something else that is coming to me.
Conclusion
As Doreen Virtue points out in her book, true and false guidance are one hundred percent reliable. True guidance consistently gives empowering advice; false guidance always gives fear-based suggestions that lead to rash decisions. Keeping the 12 distinctions between true and false guidance in mind, we'll be more likely to recognize and choose wisely.
So many of you have your own stories to tell, of decisions you made, or didn't make, times when you followed what you know, and times when you ignored that. Leave a comment, or if you'd like to share more detail, I can feature your story in a separate post - just email me. We have much to learn from one another!
I am in a 12-step recovery program, and these guidelines fit so well with the 12-step perception of a Higher Power. Thank you!
Posted by: Analisa Roche | March 13, 2007 at 06:11 PM
Analisa - thank you for stopping by. Maybe at some point in the future you may consider sharing an example of where the 12 step program fits with the factors that distinguish true guidance from false. If you feel drawn to that, we'd love to hear from you.
Posted by: Deb Call | March 14, 2007 at 02:04 PM